talkwithsharon
Sharon Kwon, LCSW
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BIPOC 🇰🇷 Psychotherapist Heal from Intergenerational Trauma www.sharonkwon.com
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I talk about grieving a lot so I thought I would share some tips on how to grieve.
What are some ways you move through grief?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #griefjourney #nervoussystemregulation #grieving #grievingjourney #grief #grieftok
What are some ways you move through grief?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #griefjourney #nervoussystemregulation #grieving #grievingjourney #grief #grieftok
What happens when you emotionally outgrow your own parents?
This is so common for adult children of immigrants who often had to grow up alongside our parents.
It takes a lot of emotional labor to continue showing up when the other party can’t.
It takes a lot of grieving to finally accept their limitations.
Where are you on your grief journey?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #emotionallyimmatureparents #adultchildrenofemotionallyimmaturearents #immigrantparents #griefjourney #asianparentsproblems #asianparents
This is so common for adult children of immigrants who often had to grow up alongside our parents.
It takes a lot of emotional labor to continue showing up when the other party can’t.
It takes a lot of grieving to finally accept their limitations.
Where are you on your grief journey?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #emotionallyimmatureparents #adultchildrenofemotionallyimmaturearents #immigrantparents #griefjourney #asianparentsproblems #asianparents
Practice regulating your nervous system so the next time you get dysregulated or triggered, your body knows exactly what to do ✨
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystem #nervoussystemhealing #copingskills #grounding #deepbreathing
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystem #nervoussystemhealing #copingskills #grounding #deepbreathing
You asked and here it is !
I recently got back from a ketamine assisted therapy training and it was lifechanging.
Ketamine openend my heart and mind and allowed me to really see my mother (who I was avoiding and dreading talking to) for the first time with compassion and love instead of anger and resentment.
I rationally knew a lot of these things but emotionally couldn’t feel it until I experienced the power of Mother K.
Life is so much better with love and compassion than with resentment.
#ketamineassistedtherapy #ketaminetherapy #ketaminefordepression #ketamineassistedpsychotherapy #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantstories #motherwound #motherwoundhealing #intergenerationaltrauma #intergenerationalhealing #grief #griefjourney #psychedelictherapy #psychedelictherapist #psychedelictok
I recently got back from a ketamine assisted therapy training and it was lifechanging.
Ketamine openend my heart and mind and allowed me to really see my mother (who I was avoiding and dreading talking to) for the first time with compassion and love instead of anger and resentment.
I rationally knew a lot of these things but emotionally couldn’t feel it until I experienced the power of Mother K.
Life is so much better with love and compassion than with resentment.
#ketamineassistedtherapy #ketaminetherapy #ketaminefordepression #ketamineassistedpsychotherapy #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantstories #motherwound #motherwoundhealing #intergenerationaltrauma #intergenerationalhealing #grief #griefjourney #psychedelictherapy #psychedelictherapist #psychedelictok
Just returned from a week on a farm in Napa, CA @ a ketamine assisted therapy training for mental health & health care professionals !
I have so many reflections and takeaways to share and they will be coming to you very soon…
I arrived an adolescent and left a woman !
I healed my mother wound and as soon as I got back I called my mom and told her how much I love her.
I actually didn’t realize how depressed I was until I feel how happy I am now.
I have so much love in my heart, I feel ready to burst !! 💖
For the first time in a very long while, my heart is wide open, ready to give & accept all kinds of love 💕
#ketamineassistedtherapy #ketaminetherapy #ketaminefordepression #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #motherwound #motherwoundhealing
I have so many reflections and takeaways to share and they will be coming to you very soon…
I arrived an adolescent and left a woman !
I healed my mother wound and as soon as I got back I called my mom and told her how much I love her.
I actually didn’t realize how depressed I was until I feel how happy I am now.
I have so much love in my heart, I feel ready to burst !! 💖
For the first time in a very long while, my heart is wide open, ready to give & accept all kinds of love 💕
#ketamineassistedtherapy #ketaminetherapy #ketaminefordepression #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #motherwound #motherwoundhealing
If you come from a culture that idealizes patriarchy, your father might be a bit narcissistic.
And when you have a narcissistic parent, there are some common themes that folks struggle with such as the savior complex or martryr complex.
Which one do you struggle with?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #patriarchy #patriarchalprogramming #narcissist #narcissism #narcissisticparent #narcissistsurvivor #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticrelationship #narcissisticparents #saviorcomplex #martryrdom #martyrcomplex #enablingparents #codependency
And when you have a narcissistic parent, there are some common themes that folks struggle with such as the savior complex or martryr complex.
Which one do you struggle with?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #patriarchy #patriarchalprogramming #narcissist #narcissism #narcissisticparent #narcissistsurvivor #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticrelationship #narcissisticparents #saviorcomplex #martryrdom #martyrcomplex #enablingparents #codependency
Recently started seeing clients in person again and couldn’t help but notice the difference!
Here are some pros & cons of in person vs. virtual therapy.
Which do you prefer?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #inpersontherapy #inpersontherapist #virtualtherapy #remotetherapy #onlinetherapy
Here are some pros & cons of in person vs. virtual therapy.
Which do you prefer?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #traumatok #inpersontherapy #inpersontherapist #virtualtherapy #remotetherapy #onlinetherapy
Shout out to all my eldest daughters of immigrants !!
I know y’all can relate to this…
Drop me a comment below and tell me about all the hats you’ve had to wear in your family of origin 👇🏽
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #traumatok #eldestdaughter #eldestdaughterproblems #codependency
I know y’all can relate to this…
Drop me a comment below and tell me about all the hats you’ve had to wear in your family of origin 👇🏽
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #traumatok #eldestdaughter #eldestdaughterproblems #codependency
Raise your hand if you’re guilty of feeling this way toward a partner or loved one 🙋🏻♀️
It might be surprising to hear, but hyper independence that glorifies self sufficiency is actually a sign of avoidant attachment and a response to trauma.
You probably grew up in a household where your needs didn’t get met and so you had to get good at meeting them yourself—out of survival.
And now as an adult, you’re great at taking care of yourself and so when others express their needs, this might come off as excessive and needy to you—even though having needs is a normal, healthy, and necessary part of life.
But instead, you end up projecting your feelings that you were a burden for having needs onto others and this makes you the emotionally unavailable partner.
But the truth is, we all have needs and that’s okay.
Next time you catch yourself feeling this way, try acknowledging this part of you who felt like you were a burden for having needs—validate that part and reassure that part that you deserve to have your needs met, just like everyone else.
Do you find yourself cringing when partners aren’t as self sufficient as you?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #traumatok #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyle #attachmentissues #dating #relationshipgoals #relationships
It might be surprising to hear, but hyper independence that glorifies self sufficiency is actually a sign of avoidant attachment and a response to trauma.
You probably grew up in a household where your needs didn’t get met and so you had to get good at meeting them yourself—out of survival.
And now as an adult, you’re great at taking care of yourself and so when others express their needs, this might come off as excessive and needy to you—even though having needs is a normal, healthy, and necessary part of life.
But instead, you end up projecting your feelings that you were a burden for having needs onto others and this makes you the emotionally unavailable partner.
But the truth is, we all have needs and that’s okay.
Next time you catch yourself feeling this way, try acknowledging this part of you who felt like you were a burden for having needs—validate that part and reassure that part that you deserve to have your needs met, just like everyone else.
Do you find yourself cringing when partners aren’t as self sufficient as you?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #traumatok #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyle #attachmentissues #dating #relationshipgoals #relationships
As many of us know, hyper-independence is a trauma response. If you grew up with your needs constantly being neglected, you learned that peope can’t be trusted and you had to take care of yourself because no one else will.
Unfortunately, we become conditioned to feel this way as adults in our relationships with our friends, partners, co-workers, and families.
But the truth is, humans are social creatures who want to connect. And trust is a huge part of connection and love.
What has your independent part been trying to protect you from? And can you ask this part to take a step back so that you can learn to trust that things are different now and if you give people who love you a chance and ask for what you need, they might surprise you and actually pull through.
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #traumatok #traumaresponse #traumahealing #hyperindependence
Unfortunately, we become conditioned to feel this way as adults in our relationships with our friends, partners, co-workers, and families.
But the truth is, humans are social creatures who want to connect. And trust is a huge part of connection and love.
What has your independent part been trying to protect you from? And can you ask this part to take a step back so that you can learn to trust that things are different now and if you give people who love you a chance and ask for what you need, they might surprise you and actually pull through.
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #traumatok #traumaresponse #traumahealing #hyperindependence
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood—
Which one will you take?
One of the takeaways of this poem is that both paths lead to the same place. Yet I almost always take the road not taken because I tend to idealize independence, which is ultimately a trauma response.
I feel like the path full of people will just slow me down and keep me from enjoying life.
But often times the road not taken leaves me feeling alone, lost, and scared.
Humans are social creatures who want to connect and I tend to neglect this need because I project my feelings that I’m a burden onto others.
So today I’m going to try something new—I’m going to take the path that’s full of people and choose love and connection instead of loneliness and fear.
Which path do you tend to take?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #traumatok #traumatized #traumahealing #traumaresponse #traumarecovery
Which one will you take?
One of the takeaways of this poem is that both paths lead to the same place. Yet I almost always take the road not taken because I tend to idealize independence, which is ultimately a trauma response.
I feel like the path full of people will just slow me down and keep me from enjoying life.
But often times the road not taken leaves me feeling alone, lost, and scared.
Humans are social creatures who want to connect and I tend to neglect this need because I project my feelings that I’m a burden onto others.
So today I’m going to try something new—I’m going to take the path that’s full of people and choose love and connection instead of loneliness and fear.
Which path do you tend to take?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #traumatok #traumatized #traumahealing #traumaresponse #traumarecovery
When we people please or put others’ needs ahead of our own, our people-pleasing part gets activated in order to protect us from a past situation or event where we got hurt.
For me, I people please in order to avoid rejection and abandonment, since as a child I often felt like I had to work for my parents’ love.
What is your people-pleasing part trying to protect you from?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #peoplepleaser #peoplepleasers #peoplepleasingrecovery #peoplepleasersrecovery
For me, I people please in order to avoid rejection and abandonment, since as a child I often felt like I had to work for my parents’ love.
What is your people-pleasing part trying to protect you from?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #peoplepleaser #peoplepleasers #peoplepleasingrecovery #peoplepleasersrecovery
Have you had to compartmentalize yourself as a way to survive?
If you grew up with strict, traditional parents—you know what I mean.
For me, there’s my identity as a therapist, a pastor’s daughter, as a crazy burner and raver, as a hippy van life adventure lover, as a responsible older sister, as a friend who loves to nurture and host, and as a mindful yogi.
A lot of times, these identities can be contradicting, which leads to a lot of cognitive dissonance and confusion.
That’s why these days I am trying to acknowledge and accept all of these parts of me so that I can show up fully and wholly, no matter who I am with.
How have you coped with your many different identities?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #compartmentalization #acceptance #acceptanceisthekey
If you grew up with strict, traditional parents—you know what I mean.
For me, there’s my identity as a therapist, a pastor’s daughter, as a crazy burner and raver, as a hippy van life adventure lover, as a responsible older sister, as a friend who loves to nurture and host, and as a mindful yogi.
A lot of times, these identities can be contradicting, which leads to a lot of cognitive dissonance and confusion.
That’s why these days I am trying to acknowledge and accept all of these parts of me so that I can show up fully and wholly, no matter who I am with.
How have you coped with your many different identities?
#tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems #immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #survivalmode #compartmentalization #acceptance #acceptanceisthekey
Is your family collective or codependent?
Immigrant families are offen so inherently collective that they veer on codependent and the idea of putting yourself and your needs ahead of your family’s can enable a lot of shame and guilt.
But the problem with codependent family dynamics is that they can carey into your personal life and relationships as adults.
Codependency doesn’t mean that you need other people to survive. Codependency is when you thrive on being needed—which leads to a lot of self abandonment.
After a while you might become resentful of the fact that you give more than you receive.
So tell me, who’s needs are you prioritizing and what are some needs that you’ve been neglecting for yourself?
#codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems
Immigrant families are offen so inherently collective that they veer on codependent and the idea of putting yourself and your needs ahead of your family’s can enable a lot of shame and guilt.
But the problem with codependent family dynamics is that they can carey into your personal life and relationships as adults.
Codependency doesn’t mean that you need other people to survive. Codependency is when you thrive on being needed—which leads to a lot of self abandonment.
After a while you might become resentful of the fact that you give more than you receive.
So tell me, who’s needs are you prioritizing and what are some needs that you’ve been neglecting for yourself?
#codependency #codependencyrecovery #codependent #tiktoktherapist #therapy #therapytiktok #therapytok #therapysessions #therapynotes #therapist #therapistsontiktok #therapistadvice #asianamerican #asiantherapist #immigrantparents #immigrantproblems
My story is a pretty typical immigrant story, where even as an adult, I still couldn’t stop feeling like I owed my hyper-religious parents my life because of everything they sacrificed for me. But when I thought about it further and came to terms with how conditional their love is (in that I have to go to church), it made me realize that their sacrifices weren’t for me at all, they made them for themselves and for their dream of living God’s purpose.
This allowed me to reframe all the shame that I had been harboring—that I was a bad daughter and bad person for not being able to obey my parents and just give them what they want. Some might call me stubborn, but I like to believe that I’m just a fighter and I won’t ever stop fighting for my values and my freedom.
I share this as we are deep into Pride month and many folks might still be struggling with showing up authentically due to a clash of values between themselves and their families. I hope you know that you deserve to live a life of your own too and there’s absolutely no shame in that ! 🙌🏽
🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜
#immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #pridemonth #pride🌈 #familytrauma #familyestrangement #estranged #familytherapy
This allowed me to reframe all the shame that I had been harboring—that I was a bad daughter and bad person for not being able to obey my parents and just give them what they want. Some might call me stubborn, but I like to believe that I’m just a fighter and I won’t ever stop fighting for my values and my freedom.
I share this as we are deep into Pride month and many folks might still be struggling with showing up authentically due to a clash of values between themselves and their families. I hope you know that you deserve to live a life of your own too and there’s absolutely no shame in that ! 🙌🏽
🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜
#immigrantstories #immigrantchildren #pridemonth #pride🌈 #familytrauma #familyestrangement #estranged #familytherapy
Do you struggle with meditation? I get it, sitting still with your eyes closed for 20 minutes is not for everyone. That’s why I love mindful walking. It’s a little more active but still allows you to practice being present and aware.
Here’s a little guided mindfulness meditation to try on your next walk! The main purpose is to stay present and focused on every little feeling and sensation you feel in your feet and legs. Try it out and let me know what you think!
#mindfulwalking #mindfulwalkingmeditation #guidedmeditation #mindfulness #tiktoktherapy #therapytok #therapy #therapytiktok #tiktoktherapist #meditation #meditationforbeginners #therapysessions #bipoctherapist #asiantherapist #mentalhealth
Here’s a little guided mindfulness meditation to try on your next walk! The main purpose is to stay present and focused on every little feeling and sensation you feel in your feet and legs. Try it out and let me know what you think!
#mindfulwalking #mindfulwalkingmeditation #guidedmeditation #mindfulness #tiktoktherapy #therapytok #therapy #therapytiktok #tiktoktherapist #meditation #meditationforbeginners #therapysessions #bipoctherapist #asiantherapist #mentalhealth