somaticspirit
Tammy Chow | Trauma Healing
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Trauma Healing, Attachment, Authenticity 💫
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Healing the mother wound has been a journey…
I am not of the belief that everyone needs to repair the relationship with their parents in this lifetime.
I am sharing my personal journey as insight into this very complex part of the healing process. Every person has a different story and different path for how they heal.
Many of us have parents who choose to not heal this part of their journey in this lifetime. I am lucky that my mom is now willing to learn and grow.
This awakening happened when we were faced with the journey of her healing from stage 3 lung cancer.
I experienced the fear of losing her with so much being left unsaid.
Now I am actively navigating the repair, while still prioritizing my own boundaries.
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#m #motherwoundg #generationaltraumaa #ancestralhealingi #intergenerationaltraumas #selfloves #selfcareh #healingt #traumah #healingjourneyi #innerworkt #traumarecoveryc #cptsdc #childhoodtraumat #traumas #somatictherapysomatichealing
I am not of the belief that everyone needs to repair the relationship with their parents in this lifetime.
I am sharing my personal journey as insight into this very complex part of the healing process. Every person has a different story and different path for how they heal.
Many of us have parents who choose to not heal this part of their journey in this lifetime. I am lucky that my mom is now willing to learn and grow.
This awakening happened when we were faced with the journey of her healing from stage 3 lung cancer.
I experienced the fear of losing her with so much being left unsaid.
Now I am actively navigating the repair, while still prioritizing my own boundaries.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
#m #motherwoundg #generationaltraumaa #ancestralhealingi #intergenerationaltraumas #selfloves #selfcareh #healingt #traumah #healingjourneyi #innerworkt #traumarecoveryc #cptsdc #childhoodtraumat #traumas #somatictherapysomatichealing
For years I struggled with disorganized and anxious attachment, and I still manage these tendencies when it comes to dating based on my history.
My story was “Everyone leaves. I’m not worthy of love. I do so much for them and they don’t give it back. I’m not good enough.”
What I wasn’t taking responsibility for was that I was still operating from my attachment strategies, doing everything I could to keep people around that were never a match for me to begin with.
Now I’m finally choosing people in my life based on whether they’re an energetic match for ME, and consciously dating through the lense of “Are you qualified?” vs. “How can I make you like me?” and seeing a totally different reality in who I attract and the CHOICE I have in the trajectory of my relationships.
Here are some of the major shifts I made:
I changed my dating profile to accurately represent who I am and what I’m looking for, even if I know it will repel a majority of suitors.
I took radical responsibility of my victim narratives and studied frameworks for communicating my desires, needs, and boundaries more effectively with non-violent communication and attachment styles.
I put myself in group containers to actively work through my nervous system responses when communicating and to re-wire my attachment style when it comes to relating with others, not just 1:1 therapy.
If you’re ready to be braver in relationships, relate authentically, and feel unafraid of showing up to build self-confidence and be open to a real connection with whomever you meet, my 3-month program The Art of Relating is dedicated to helping you step into relational leadership to do so.
Comment “Me” to get the link to apply!
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#attachment #anxiousattachment #disorganizedattachment #relationships #connection #community #attachmentstyles #authenticrelating #circling #healingjourney #somatichealing #somatictherapy #relationaltrauma #repair #secureattachment #traumahealing #attachmentrepatterning
My story was “Everyone leaves. I’m not worthy of love. I do so much for them and they don’t give it back. I’m not good enough.”
What I wasn’t taking responsibility for was that I was still operating from my attachment strategies, doing everything I could to keep people around that were never a match for me to begin with.
Now I’m finally choosing people in my life based on whether they’re an energetic match for ME, and consciously dating through the lense of “Are you qualified?” vs. “How can I make you like me?” and seeing a totally different reality in who I attract and the CHOICE I have in the trajectory of my relationships.
Here are some of the major shifts I made:
I changed my dating profile to accurately represent who I am and what I’m looking for, even if I know it will repel a majority of suitors.
I took radical responsibility of my victim narratives and studied frameworks for communicating my desires, needs, and boundaries more effectively with non-violent communication and attachment styles.
I put myself in group containers to actively work through my nervous system responses when communicating and to re-wire my attachment style when it comes to relating with others, not just 1:1 therapy.
If you’re ready to be braver in relationships, relate authentically, and feel unafraid of showing up to build self-confidence and be open to a real connection with whomever you meet, my 3-month program The Art of Relating is dedicated to helping you step into relational leadership to do so.
Comment “Me” to get the link to apply!
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#attachment #anxiousattachment #disorganizedattachment #relationships #connection #community #attachmentstyles #authenticrelating #circling #healingjourney #somatichealing #somatictherapy #relationaltrauma #repair #secureattachment #traumahealing #attachmentrepatterning
If you were constantly told *"It's okay, you're fine."* or *"Stop crying."* etc. when you were younger, your nervous system experiences this as a fight response or abandonment.
What you really needed was nourishing attunement and co-regulation to allow your big emotions to naturally flow through and settle.
**This is how you give your inner child what they didn't get.**
*It's okay if you feel sad. It's okay if you feel angry. It's okay if you feel anxious.*
Keep attending to your little self to create secure attachment within your own body and notice how you might respond differently to your external environment.
Subscribe to my email list for more somatic healing.
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#anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #emotionaldysregulation #disorganizedattachment #secureattachment #polyvagaltheory #nervoussystemhealing #nervoussystem #nervoussystemregulation #anxiety #panicattacks #somatictherapy #somatics #traumahealing #somatichealing #healingjourney #innerchildhealing #innerchild #attachmentstyles #ptsd #cptsd
What you really needed was nourishing attunement and co-regulation to allow your big emotions to naturally flow through and settle.
**This is how you give your inner child what they didn't get.**
*It's okay if you feel sad. It's okay if you feel angry. It's okay if you feel anxious.*
Keep attending to your little self to create secure attachment within your own body and notice how you might respond differently to your external environment.
Subscribe to my email list for more somatic healing.
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,
#anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #emotionaldysregulation #disorganizedattachment #secureattachment #polyvagaltheory #nervoussystemhealing #nervoussystem #nervoussystemregulation #anxiety #panicattacks #somatictherapy #somatics #traumahealing #somatichealing #healingjourney #innerchildhealing #innerchild #attachmentstyles #ptsd #cptsd
My digital course Life Is Art: Embody Your Soul’s Purpose is the ultimate resource for anyone seeking freedom through emotional regulation.
It's packed with 5+ hours of extensive nervous system education and somatic exercises, crafted to both increase your capacity for flow and educate you on your journey getting back into your body.
Get it for 50% off right now. It’s just $33.
Click the link in my bio that says “Regulate your nervous system with my digital course.”
You’re welcome and THANK YOU ❤️❤️
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#nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystemhealing #nervoussystem #trauma #traumahealingjourney #traumahealing #somatichealing #somatictherapy #somaticexercise #somaticexperiencing #somatics #somaticmovement #somatictherapist #somaticpractitioner
It's packed with 5+ hours of extensive nervous system education and somatic exercises, crafted to both increase your capacity for flow and educate you on your journey getting back into your body.
Get it for 50% off right now. It’s just $33.
Click the link in my bio that says “Regulate your nervous system with my digital course.”
You’re welcome and THANK YOU ❤️❤️
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#nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystemhealing #nervoussystem #trauma #traumahealingjourney #traumahealing #somatichealing #somatictherapy #somaticexercise #somaticexperiencing #somatics #somaticmovement #somatictherapist #somaticpractitioner
Grief is not something that needs to be “cured” or “healed.”
That implies there is something inherently wrong with it and you.
Many of us didn’t grow up with caretakers who had the capacity to be with our grief, so we can feel uncomfortable when we are in the face of it within ourselves and others.
Cultivating the compassionate witness within yourself to turn towards your wounded part instead of dismiss them is how to start practicing not abandoning self when feeling overwhelmed with big emotions.
This is how you start to expand your capacity to be with grief, and therefore more love.
Myself and @zoritomova are here to help you learn how to cultivate these energies in a supportive group environment in The Art of Relating, my 3-month container that is now open for enrollment.
Apply in the link in my bio. ❤️
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#attachment #attachmentstyles #attachmentrepatterning #grief #traumahealing #healingtrauma #spirituality #healing #internalfamilysystems #partswork #community #relationaltrauma #relationships #depressionhelp #depression #therapy
That implies there is something inherently wrong with it and you.
Many of us didn’t grow up with caretakers who had the capacity to be with our grief, so we can feel uncomfortable when we are in the face of it within ourselves and others.
Cultivating the compassionate witness within yourself to turn towards your wounded part instead of dismiss them is how to start practicing not abandoning self when feeling overwhelmed with big emotions.
This is how you start to expand your capacity to be with grief, and therefore more love.
Myself and @zoritomova are here to help you learn how to cultivate these energies in a supportive group environment in The Art of Relating, my 3-month container that is now open for enrollment.
Apply in the link in my bio. ❤️
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#attachment #attachmentstyles #attachmentrepatterning #grief #traumahealing #healingtrauma #spirituality #healing #internalfamilysystems #partswork #community #relationaltrauma #relationships #depressionhelp #depression #therapy
We made this collective poem in the Grief Ritual Workshop last week, inspired by an exercise from @mirabaistarr in @wildheartspace.
Please tag your line in the comments and I invite anyone who couldn’t make it to contribute yours as well!
If Grief Could Be A Part of Me
If grief could be a part of me…
I would dance in the sky and touch the coldness of each star
I would finally let the shadow join the party,
she would smell like freshly baked cookies
Grief, the black, cold, dim-lit space that is so scary to visit.
It would try to crawl its way out,
but stay just below to make me want to scream,
and tighten so I never would.
It would be the animal that looks into the darkness without fear.
I’d hear my ancestors and spirit guides rooting for me,
like veins of gold, running through my hands, my feet, my heart.
I could taste grief in the crunch of the last grape off the cluster,
I would hold it close and give it chocolate.
This part wouldn’t have to feel raw,jagged and rejected
but smooth and kissed by droplets of tears.
No more pain, turn into rainwater, gold,
turn Into art, bought and sold.
I'd light one thousand candles,
feel their warmth, lay down in the glow, and sleep.
I’d accept it as part of my emotional body,
without it, other parts would not function…
such as love.
I would not sway as i felt the discomfort of being seen.
If grief was a part of me…
I would just be me.
______
As I feel the pain of physical separation after being with my Body Temple family this weekend with @artofloving, I am being asked to simply allow myself to be here without shame.
When we create so much capacity for grief, we create so much capacity for unstoppable love.
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#grief #healing #healingjourney #traumahealing #community #relationaltrauma #relationships #relationalrepair #love #spiritualawakening #attachment #togetherness
Please tag your line in the comments and I invite anyone who couldn’t make it to contribute yours as well!
If Grief Could Be A Part of Me
If grief could be a part of me…
I would dance in the sky and touch the coldness of each star
I would finally let the shadow join the party,
she would smell like freshly baked cookies
Grief, the black, cold, dim-lit space that is so scary to visit.
It would try to crawl its way out,
but stay just below to make me want to scream,
and tighten so I never would.
It would be the animal that looks into the darkness without fear.
I’d hear my ancestors and spirit guides rooting for me,
like veins of gold, running through my hands, my feet, my heart.
I could taste grief in the crunch of the last grape off the cluster,
I would hold it close and give it chocolate.
This part wouldn’t have to feel raw,jagged and rejected
but smooth and kissed by droplets of tears.
No more pain, turn into rainwater, gold,
turn Into art, bought and sold.
I'd light one thousand candles,
feel their warmth, lay down in the glow, and sleep.
I’d accept it as part of my emotional body,
without it, other parts would not function…
such as love.
I would not sway as i felt the discomfort of being seen.
If grief was a part of me…
I would just be me.
______
As I feel the pain of physical separation after being with my Body Temple family this weekend with @artofloving, I am being asked to simply allow myself to be here without shame.
When we create so much capacity for grief, we create so much capacity for unstoppable love.
.
.
.
#grief #healing #healingjourney #traumahealing #community #relationaltrauma #relationships #relationalrepair #love #spiritualawakening #attachment #togetherness
Gain a felt sense of secure attachment and nourishing resource for you nervous system, as we hold each other in deep presence.
Responding to what is needed at this time, this will be a space to be with one another to feel seen and heard with whatever is arising - grief, rage, pain, fear, joy.
Be in a space where ALL of you is welcome in the company of others as we practice how to hold space for one another and experience deeper connection and intimacy.
All are welcome to the Attachment workshop this Thursday at 10am-12pm pst.
This is a donation based space.
Link in bio or DM me to sign up!
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#grief #sacrdgrief #togetherness #love #healingjourney #traumahealing #community #collectivehealing #attachment #attachmentrepatterning #repair #conflict #healthyconflict #attachmentstyles #relationaltrauma #disorganizedattachment #anxiousattachment #secureattachment #avoidant #griefjourney #griefsupport #rage
Responding to what is needed at this time, this will be a space to be with one another to feel seen and heard with whatever is arising - grief, rage, pain, fear, joy.
Be in a space where ALL of you is welcome in the company of others as we practice how to hold space for one another and experience deeper connection and intimacy.
All are welcome to the Attachment workshop this Thursday at 10am-12pm pst.
This is a donation based space.
Link in bio or DM me to sign up!
.
.
.
#grief #sacrdgrief #togetherness #love #healingjourney #traumahealing #community #collectivehealing #attachment #attachmentrepatterning #repair #conflict #healthyconflict #attachmentstyles #relationaltrauma #disorganizedattachment #anxiousattachment #secureattachment #avoidant #griefjourney #griefsupport #rage
If you were ever ignored by your parent as a child, your body may have experienced this as abandonment. This triggers a life or death response in the body.
The adaptive behavior you developed to survive is to never let that happen again by being as perfect as possible to avoid future ruptures.
As an adult, this carries into your relationships where you learn to appease your partner and never speak up for your needs for fear of being abandoned again.
This feels like an insecure attachment, which leaves you feeling unsettled and unsafe in relationships.
Learn how to change this story in Authentic Attachment, my 12-week program now open for enrollment!
Apply in my link in bio or DM me.
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.
.
#attachmentstyles #attachmentrepatterning #attachment #repair #relationships #relationshipadvice #relationaltrauma #somatictherapy #somatics #somaticexperiencing #somatichealing #anxiousattachment #avoidant #insecureattachment #secureattachment #disorganizedattachment #healing #healingjourney #healthyconflict #communicationskills
The adaptive behavior you developed to survive is to never let that happen again by being as perfect as possible to avoid future ruptures.
As an adult, this carries into your relationships where you learn to appease your partner and never speak up for your needs for fear of being abandoned again.
This feels like an insecure attachment, which leaves you feeling unsettled and unsafe in relationships.
Learn how to change this story in Authentic Attachment, my 12-week program now open for enrollment!
Apply in my link in bio or DM me.
.
.
.
#attachmentstyles #attachmentrepatterning #attachment #repair #relationships #relationshipadvice #relationaltrauma #somatictherapy #somatics #somaticexperiencing #somatichealing #anxiousattachment #avoidant #insecureattachment #secureattachment #disorganizedattachment #healing #healingjourney #healthyconflict #communicationskills
In the midst of so much collective grief, pain and fear, it’s okay to feel shut down, helpless and disconnected.
Don’t forget how helpful it is for you to nourish yourself and expand your capacity to truly take in the comfort, love, and safety that you have available to you right now.
Simply resourcing yourself nurtures and uplifts those around you and has an impact on your immediate community.
Your capacity to hold grief and loss, while also sipping each breath with gratitude, is part of the collective uplifting to not be wiped out and crumble to the energies of fear, hatred and violence.
Art is waking up from the illusion of our separateness and returning back to our true nature as love.
Your ability to resource yourself is a gift to the collective.
I’ve included 6+ hours of nervous system education, regulating exercises, somatic movement practice and grief and rage rituals in Life Is Art, so you can live your life in the present to truly take in the preciousness of it all.
I’m extending the 40% pre-sale discount because I believe these tools are so necessary, and I hope that they can provide you some support during this time.
Use code LIFEISART40 to get it for $39.60. Link in my bio.
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#nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystem #anxiety #grief
#rage #emotionalregulation #healingjourney #cptsd #somatichealing #somaticexperiencing #somatics #somatictherapy #healing #polyvagaltheory
Credit to @Allie Michelle 💖
Don’t forget how helpful it is for you to nourish yourself and expand your capacity to truly take in the comfort, love, and safety that you have available to you right now.
Simply resourcing yourself nurtures and uplifts those around you and has an impact on your immediate community.
Your capacity to hold grief and loss, while also sipping each breath with gratitude, is part of the collective uplifting to not be wiped out and crumble to the energies of fear, hatred and violence.
Art is waking up from the illusion of our separateness and returning back to our true nature as love.
Your ability to resource yourself is a gift to the collective.
I’ve included 6+ hours of nervous system education, regulating exercises, somatic movement practice and grief and rage rituals in Life Is Art, so you can live your life in the present to truly take in the preciousness of it all.
I’m extending the 40% pre-sale discount because I believe these tools are so necessary, and I hope that they can provide you some support during this time.
Use code LIFEISART40 to get it for $39.60. Link in my bio.
.
.
.
#nervoussystemregulation #nervoussystem #anxiety #grief
#rage #emotionalregulation #healingjourney #cptsd #somatichealing #somaticexperiencing #somatics #somatictherapy #healing #polyvagaltheory
Credit to @Allie Michelle 💖
Can’t wait to teach about attachment styles and watch people witness how they play out in real-time in Authentic Attachment.
It’s me and @zoritomova’s 12-week course which launches this Thursday for enrollment!
Sign up to the waitlist to be the first to know.
Link in bio or DM me to join 🫶
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#attachment #disorganizedattachment #traumahealing #healingjourney #relationships #datingadvice #authenticity #attachmentstyles
It’s me and @zoritomova’s 12-week course which launches this Thursday for enrollment!
Sign up to the waitlist to be the first to know.
Link in bio or DM me to join 🫶
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#attachment #disorganizedattachment #traumahealing #healingjourney #relationships #datingadvice #authenticity #attachmentstyles
My best friend and I have sent each other voice notes every morning this month reminding each other of this mantra.
It resulted in us experiencing some of the biggest paradigm shifts and breakthroughs because we allowed ourselves to be still and receive what Spirit needed us to hear.
Curious what happens if you try this with a friend ☺️❤️🫶
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#bff #healingjourney #healingtrauma #hustleculture #rest #nervoussystem #nervoussystemregulation
It resulted in us experiencing some of the biggest paradigm shifts and breakthroughs because we allowed ourselves to be still and receive what Spirit needed us to hear.
Curious what happens if you try this with a friend ☺️❤️🫶
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#bff #healingjourney #healingtrauma #hustleculture #rest #nervoussystem #nervoussystemregulation
Relating is a pathway to liberation. ✨
❤️🔥 It’s the way to get to know yourself deeper by learning how to speak your truth in the face of abandonment, fear, judgement, or being misunderstand.
✨ Doing so takes practice, either in relationships or in safe containers where you can practice these skills so your nervous system learns to feel safe expressing your truth.
❤️🔥 Me and @zoritomova are so excited to launch Authentic Attachment, a 12-week experiential workshop for us to do this together in a group.
✨ Registration opens soon! Sign up for the waitlist for more info.
Link in bio or DM me. ❤️🔥
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#relationships #secureattachment #attachment #relationaltrauma #relationalrepair #attachmentrepatterning #anxiousattachment #avoidant #authenticrelating #authenticitycoach #authenticity #circling #healingjourney #healthyconflict #communicationskills
❤️🔥 It’s the way to get to know yourself deeper by learning how to speak your truth in the face of abandonment, fear, judgement, or being misunderstand.
✨ Doing so takes practice, either in relationships or in safe containers where you can practice these skills so your nervous system learns to feel safe expressing your truth.
❤️🔥 Me and @zoritomova are so excited to launch Authentic Attachment, a 12-week experiential workshop for us to do this together in a group.
✨ Registration opens soon! Sign up for the waitlist for more info.
Link in bio or DM me. ❤️🔥
.
.
.
#relationships #secureattachment #attachment #relationaltrauma #relationalrepair #attachmentrepatterning #anxiousattachment #avoidant #authenticrelating #authenticitycoach #authenticity #circling #healingjourney #healthyconflict #communicationskills
Just a reminder that the actual healing journey looks more ugly than pretty sometimes.
So much of my work is holding people in the depths of their mess and reminding them that they are exactly where they need to be.
Your only work in these moments is to just feel the rage and grief that your inner critic and voices of shame usually keep you from feeling.
You might feel like you’ve taken “ten steps back,” but in reality this is a portal inviting you into an unraveling process that will lead you closer to your truth.
I had the most magical, inspirational journey in Guatemala this past month, but now my unwinding process looks like eating blocks of cheese and chips for dinner, vegging out with edibles and bawling my eyes out for the past week.
It’s all part of the process, and the “ugly” messy parts of my journey are as much works of art as the “instagrammable” parts.
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#uglycry #vulnerability #intimacy #attachment #grief #portal #initiation #spirituality #healingjourney #cptsd #trauma #traumahealing #innerchildhealing #innerchild
So much of my work is holding people in the depths of their mess and reminding them that they are exactly where they need to be.
Your only work in these moments is to just feel the rage and grief that your inner critic and voices of shame usually keep you from feeling.
You might feel like you’ve taken “ten steps back,” but in reality this is a portal inviting you into an unraveling process that will lead you closer to your truth.
I had the most magical, inspirational journey in Guatemala this past month, but now my unwinding process looks like eating blocks of cheese and chips for dinner, vegging out with edibles and bawling my eyes out for the past week.
It’s all part of the process, and the “ugly” messy parts of my journey are as much works of art as the “instagrammable” parts.
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.
.
#uglycry #vulnerability #intimacy #attachment #grief #portal #initiation #spirituality #healingjourney #cptsd #trauma #traumahealing #innerchildhealing #innerchild