Upload

Log in to follow creators, like videos, and view comments.

eh-background

Create effects

See more
© 2023 TikTok

jessikneeland

Jessi Kneeland

50Following
139Followers
1882Likes

Body image coach. TEDx speaker. Author of BODY NEUTRAL.

One of my FAVORITE tools for body neutrality is something I call “grouchy acceptance.” 😤

Body acceptance is NOT reserved for spiritually evolved people who experience a zen-like feeling of peace and love and surrender when things don’t go their way.

Seriously.

Acceptance can be grouchy. Acceptance can be petty and sarcastic and irritable. And these experiences are not only VALID, they’re often WAY more practicable and accessible.

So stop waiting for some spiritually enlightened version of you to accept your body or appearance, and try practicing grouchy acceptance today.

📚 Learn more about this in my book BODY NEUTRAL: A Revolutionary Guide to Overcoming Body Image Issues. (Available wherever you buy books or audiobooks!)

#bodyneutral #bodyneutrality #bodyimage #bodyimageissues #bodyimagemovement #bodypositivity #bodypositive #bopo #bopotiktok #bodyimagecoach #bodyneutralitymovement #bodyneutralitycoach #selfacceptance #bodyacceptance #confidence #bodyconfidence #selfworth #mentalhealth #bodyneutralitymovement #bodyneutralityjourney #bodyneutralityadvocate #bodyneutralcoach #grouchyacceptance #bodyimagetips
Oh my GOD y’all, today’s new episode of my podcast This Is (Not) About Your Body is a GOLDMINE. 🌟⚜️👸

My guest is the brilliant therapist and dating coach @jessicannengle, who talks about the impact that growing up in a narcissistic family system can have on a person’s sense of identity, self-worth, behaviors, and body image!!

I learned SO much from Jessica during our conversation, and I am beyond excited to share this episode with you.
Also
This episode is a MUST-LISTEN episode, if:
▪️You struggle with people-pleasing, boundary setting, or advocating for your needs.
▪️You struggle with self objectification, or catch yourself objectifying others— whether around attractiveness/desirability, or a specific quality, role, or behavior you’ve learned *gives* you value. (I.e.: the “golden child,” the caretaker, or putting other people first).
▪️You have super-rigid standards around appearance, for yourself or others.
▪️ You simultaneously both feel superior and inferior to other people, and tend to flip back and forth between the two.
▪️You experience intense anxiety about disappointing people, breaking the “rules,” or breaking with other people’s expectations.
▪️You struggle with shame, imposter syndrome, anxious attachment, feeling unworthy, or feeling like “too much.”

Whether or not there was an emotionally immature or self-absorbed person in *your* family system growing up, this episode is full of wisdom about relationships, vulnerability, and self-acceptance, which means it’s for *everyone.* (Plus, as Jessica points out in the episode, the overarching “family system” of our society IS narcissistic, so we’ve all been exposed to this dynamic, no matter how our family looked growing up!!)

🎙️Listen to the whole episode now wherever you get your podcasts, or watch the video on my YouTube channel!!

Also I want to hear what you think about this clip. Did anything in it surprise you? Have *you* ever known a narcissist? Share in the comments!! 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼

#bodyimage #bodyneutral #bodyneutrality #bodyimageissues #selfacceptance #selfworth #bodyimagecoach #relationshipcoach #attachment #therapy #therapist #relationships #narcissist #narcissism #narcissistic #narcissisticparent #peoplepleaser #anxiousattachment #therapytiktok #relationships #healing #recovery #family #objectification
As my clients start to work on body acceptance and neutrality (and realize that diets don’t work), I’m often asked some version of these two questions:

👉🏼“How do I get ok with the fact that I’m just never going to lose the weight??”
👉🏼“How do I accept that I’m just never going to look how I want to look??”

The answer isn’t sexy, or easy, or fun, but there IS an answer: GRIEF.

▪️You GRIEVE the loss of hope, inspiration, goodness, validation, or worthiness associated with starting a new diet, losing weight, etc.
▪️You GRIEVE the loss of privilege, status, and social capital (and sometimes activities, relationships, and accessibility!) associated with a smaller or more “conventionally attractive” body.
▪️You GRIEVE the loss of the long-cherished fantasy you’ve been daydreaming about— of the person you would become, the problems that would be solved, the way you would feel, and perfect glorious life you’ve been imagining for yourself, on the other side of losing weight or looking different.

I *know* this isn’t the answer you want, but it is the answer that WORKS, because grief is an important part of acceptance.

What have you had to grieve on your journey to body acceptance? What do you *still* need to grieve to get there? Share in the comments!! 💕

#bodyneutral #bodyneutrality #bodyimage #bodyimageissues #bodyimagemovement #bodypositivity #bodypositive #bopo #selfacceptance #bodyacceptance #selfworth #confidence #bodyconfidence #bodyimagecoach #mentalhealth #jessikneeland #antidiet #diet #dietculture #fatliberationmonth #bopotiktok #fyp #bodyneutralitymovement #bodyacceptancemovement #body #beauty #beautyideals
I was looking back through old photos of me, to use for tomorrow morning’s email to my list. (Note: it’s about gender euphoria and wearing a suit for the first time— be sure to get on my mailing list using the link in my bio to read it!!)

In the process, I came across these fabulous short-hair photos of me from six years ago!!

When I was 30, I shaved my head. 💇🏻

I thought of it as a social experiment, and an opportunity to challenge and dismantle internalized beauty ideals around hair and femininity. (And for the record, I learned a TON!)

Anyway… I didn’t particularly like how I looked with NO hair, but I REALLY loved how I looked as it grew out, through the various short stages shown in these pictures, like pixie, undercut, and bedhead. 😍😍

That said, I’ve always seen my hair (and life!) as a grand experiment, so I’ve been letting it grow out ever since.

Lately I’ve been really *loving* my long hair— it’s long, it’s wild, and it’s decently healthy. It’s never been dyed, and it’s rarely touched heat. Honestly I’m just curious how long I can grow it before split ends (or a strong urge to make a change lol) force my hand!

So yeah. Sometimes I *do* really miss my short hair— especially when I daydream about how much less often I’d be misgendered if I chopped it off again!! But I’m just not ready yet to give up my lion’s mane. 🦁

So for today I just want to share these photos, and a bit of my
#bodyneutrality story. 💕

#hair #shorthair #shorthairdontcare #longhair #longhairdontcare #pixiecut #mohawk #bedhead #gender #genderidentity #genderexpression #queer #nonbinary #feminine #masculine #femininity #masculinity #bodyneutral #genderneutral #bodyimage #bodyimageissues #jessikneeland #queertok #bodyimagemovement #bodyneutralitymovement
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but YOUR BODY IMAGE ISSUES MAKE SENSE. 📢📢📢

They exist for a PURPOSE, and the key to
#bodyneutrality is figuring out what that purpose is, and then making it obsolete, one way or another.

📚Check out my book BODY NEUTRAL: A REVOLUTIONARY GUIDE TO OVERCOMING BODY IMAGE ISSUES to learn the exact steps to this process, or…

👩🏻‍💻 DM me to apply for body neutrality coaching, if you’re looking for more personalized guidance and support!

#body #bopo #bodyneutrality #bodyliberation #bodyimage #negativebodyimage #bodyimageissues #bodyacceptance #selfworth #bodyimagehealing #bodyimagejourney #selflovetips #beautyideals #bodypositivity #bodyimagecoach #mentalhealth #healing #recovery #selfcare #selfcompassion #fyp #jessikneeland #BoNeu
Good news! You *don’t* need to worry about whether or not it’s “ok” to make specific decisions about your appearance (including those that align with conventional beauty ideals!) if your goal is body neutrality!

There IS NO SUCH THING as a “body neutral” action, or behavior, because all actions/behaviors can be done from a place of body neutrality OR a place of body negativity (ie: shame, fear, obligation, etc), and you have total autonomy over what you do with your body and how you present yourself!

The big difference is that when you make a choice from a place of body neutrality, you’re actually making that choice from a place of FREEDOM and AUTONOMY— not coerced into making it because society says you should.

So don’t stress. There’s no need to feel guilty (or like a failure) for any of the choices you make with regard to your body or appearance. Just recognize that you deserve to make those choices from a place of liberation, worthiness, and power. 🔥💕🎉

Looking for guidance or support on your body neutrality journey? Check out my book BODY NEUTRAL (available anywhere you buy books or audiobooks!) or DM me to apply for private coaching with me! 🙏🏼😋

#bodyneutral #bodyneutrality #bodyneutralitymovement #bodyneutralityadvocate #bodyimage #bodyimageissues #bodyimagemovement #bodypositivity #bodypositive #bopotiktok #bopo #selfacceptance #bodyacceptance #selfworth #confidence #bodyconfidence #bodyimagecoach #beauty #beautyideals #beautystandards #femme #makeup #diet #fitness #weight #liberation #autonomy
Get TikTok App