coachingbyantonia
Antonia Greco
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Personal Development Coach Former Matchmaker https://www.coachingbyantonia.com
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Be discerning when you’re getting to know someone.
If someone is inviting you over to their place or back to their place on Date #1 , then they are probably not looking for something serious or they are trying to speed thing up. Or they’re psychopathic.
In other words, they’re either emotionally dangerous or physically dangerous. Date smarter.
#datingcoach #firstdatetips #datingadvice #redflags
If someone is inviting you over to their place or back to their place on Date #1 , then they are probably not looking for something serious or they are trying to speed thing up. Or they’re psychopathic.
In other words, they’re either emotionally dangerous or physically dangerous. Date smarter.
#datingcoach #firstdatetips #datingadvice #redflags
Our journey in life becomes disrupted when we get stuck in situations that no longer serve us.
Time is something we cannot get back in life and perhaps one of our most valuable resources.
The more conscious we become, the more conscious we behave.
#personaldevelopmentcoach #datingcoach #mindset #relationships #energy #time #davidricho
Time is something we cannot get back in life and perhaps one of our most valuable resources.
The more conscious we become, the more conscious we behave.
#personaldevelopmentcoach #datingcoach #mindset #relationships #energy #time #davidricho
Think of change as turning a dial rather than flipping a switch.
Anytime we are at a point of change - regardless of whether it was self-imposed or something out of our control - recognize that we are also at a point of massive growth and personal development.
But change doesn’t happen over night. It takes time, effort and consistency.
When we turn a dial on our behavior, we are gradually increasing the volume on the changes we are making while figuratively lowering the volume on the thing we are trying to overcome.
This is more effective than “flipping a switch” because abruptly changing your behavior might leave you in a position that is not sustainable.
By gradually moving in the direction you’re trying to go, you make it easier for yourself to acclimate to the changes you’re trying to make.
#personaldevelopmentcoach #mindset #turningadial #behaviorchange
Anytime we are at a point of change - regardless of whether it was self-imposed or something out of our control - recognize that we are also at a point of massive growth and personal development.
But change doesn’t happen over night. It takes time, effort and consistency.
When we turn a dial on our behavior, we are gradually increasing the volume on the changes we are making while figuratively lowering the volume on the thing we are trying to overcome.
This is more effective than “flipping a switch” because abruptly changing your behavior might leave you in a position that is not sustainable.
By gradually moving in the direction you’re trying to go, you make it easier for yourself to acclimate to the changes you’re trying to make.
#personaldevelopmentcoach #mindset #turningadial #behaviorchange
Getting over an ex is a process.
In many cases, recovering from a breakup is similar to drug rehabilitation. Our body goes through craving and withdrawals that make it difficult to function. We are forced to “get clean”.
We also go through the 5 stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression ans acceptance).
It’s pretty clear to see, breakups are no joke. Our larger than life feelings must be processed and dealt with. Not to mention, the emotional space that was occupied by our ex must now be filled with something else.
Now is the time to learn how to regulate your emotions in healthy and constructive ways. This means we have to go INWARD instead of relying on props such as food, alcohol, porn, or drugs.
Its important to transform these heavy feelings into lighter ones. Self-care and self-love are paramount.
And remember, just because someone moved on doesnt actually mean theyve moved on.
Block any reminder of your ex so you can use all of that free energy to create your future.
#breakups #exes #relationships #dabda #recovery #12step #alchemy
In many cases, recovering from a breakup is similar to drug rehabilitation. Our body goes through craving and withdrawals that make it difficult to function. We are forced to “get clean”.
We also go through the 5 stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression ans acceptance).
It’s pretty clear to see, breakups are no joke. Our larger than life feelings must be processed and dealt with. Not to mention, the emotional space that was occupied by our ex must now be filled with something else.
Now is the time to learn how to regulate your emotions in healthy and constructive ways. This means we have to go INWARD instead of relying on props such as food, alcohol, porn, or drugs.
Its important to transform these heavy feelings into lighter ones. Self-care and self-love are paramount.
And remember, just because someone moved on doesnt actually mean theyve moved on.
Block any reminder of your ex so you can use all of that free energy to create your future.
#breakups #exes #relationships #dabda #recovery #12step #alchemy
Putting someone on a pedestal is a dangerous move - especially when it comes to the person we’re dating.
Sure, it’s ok to admire our partner…as an equal. But when we place someone ABOVE us, that can only mean that we now are BELOW them.
Simply put, if you treat someone like a king or a queen and they are not treating you the same way in return, that makes you a village person. A plebeian. In other words, you won’t earn status or respect by bowing down to someone.
Not only does pedestaling create an unhealthy and uneven dynamic, but it also means we’re devaluing ourselves by believing we are less than or that we need to “earn” or buy love. This is transactional, desperate and can even be manipulative. Why? Because this is the ego and our unhealed traumas at play. Not to mention, it puts us in a position to get taken advantage of.
Now I’m not saying that if you’re a giver to stop giving. But it’s important to find someone who is also a giver or at least someone that matches your investment (both physically and emotionally). This helps you to avoid someone that is a taker or who only wants to be with you for what you can offer.
When you idealize someone, you’re seeing them for who you want them to be aka who your ego wants them yo be. Expectations become unrealistic. This means you might ignore red flags or put up with something you otherwise wouldn’t…or not “rocking the boat” for fear of losing this person.
Remember, authentic and healthy relationships are built on a MUTUAL understating and acceptance of the other. It is a CO-CREATION.
Oh and one last thing, you also don’t want to be the person on the pedestal either. Because once your partner realizes you’re human, they will massively be let down.
#pedestal #relationships #equanimity #mutualrespect #datingadvice
Sure, it’s ok to admire our partner…as an equal. But when we place someone ABOVE us, that can only mean that we now are BELOW them.
Simply put, if you treat someone like a king or a queen and they are not treating you the same way in return, that makes you a village person. A plebeian. In other words, you won’t earn status or respect by bowing down to someone.
Not only does pedestaling create an unhealthy and uneven dynamic, but it also means we’re devaluing ourselves by believing we are less than or that we need to “earn” or buy love. This is transactional, desperate and can even be manipulative. Why? Because this is the ego and our unhealed traumas at play. Not to mention, it puts us in a position to get taken advantage of.
Now I’m not saying that if you’re a giver to stop giving. But it’s important to find someone who is also a giver or at least someone that matches your investment (both physically and emotionally). This helps you to avoid someone that is a taker or who only wants to be with you for what you can offer.
When you idealize someone, you’re seeing them for who you want them to be aka who your ego wants them yo be. Expectations become unrealistic. This means you might ignore red flags or put up with something you otherwise wouldn’t…or not “rocking the boat” for fear of losing this person.
Remember, authentic and healthy relationships are built on a MUTUAL understating and acceptance of the other. It is a CO-CREATION.
Oh and one last thing, you also don’t want to be the person on the pedestal either. Because once your partner realizes you’re human, they will massively be let down.
#pedestal #relationships #equanimity #mutualrespect #datingadvice
The tragedies of life are often synonymous with grief.
Whenever we experience a significant change or loss in life, not only do we grieve what happened or what is about to happen, but we also grieve what didn’t get to happen or what no longer can happen.
As we roll with the punches of life, we quickly learn that the only constant is change. Everything has a beginning, a middle and an end. The mystery and unpredictability of life lies within this timing. Whenever something is lost, something is gained and our resilience is reinforced.
This is why it is SO important to be present as much as possible and express gratitude every single day.
#life #grief #change #greatsacandagalake
Whenever we experience a significant change or loss in life, not only do we grieve what happened or what is about to happen, but we also grieve what didn’t get to happen or what no longer can happen.
As we roll with the punches of life, we quickly learn that the only constant is change. Everything has a beginning, a middle and an end. The mystery and unpredictability of life lies within this timing. Whenever something is lost, something is gained and our resilience is reinforced.
This is why it is SO important to be present as much as possible and express gratitude every single day.
#life #grief #change #greatsacandagalake
Uncomfortable or difficult conversations can be hard to have - especially if you’re not used to having them.
Anytime you have to have a hard conversation with someone or tell them something that might be hard to swallow, it’s important to first make sure now is a good time and that they have the bandwidth.
And secondly, if this is new to you, don’t be afraid to let the other person know. If they’re a reasonable person they’ll likely be appreciative for the heads up and are more likely to be cooperative rather than defensive with you.
#uncomfortableconversations #communicationskills #personaldevelopment #relationships
Anytime you have to have a hard conversation with someone or tell them something that might be hard to swallow, it’s important to first make sure now is a good time and that they have the bandwidth.
And secondly, if this is new to you, don’t be afraid to let the other person know. If they’re a reasonable person they’ll likely be appreciative for the heads up and are more likely to be cooperative rather than defensive with you.
#uncomfortableconversations #communicationskills #personaldevelopment #relationships
The 3 relationships that influence your love life are the relationship you had with your mom, the relationship you had with your dad, and the relationship you witnessed the two of them having. This becomes the blueprint for our romantic relationships as an adult.
Why?
Because our first relationship in life was the one we had with our caregiver(s). If our needs were not met or were inconsistently met, we usually go on to develop and insecure attachment as an adult, even if our caregivers did the best job they could. This is why it is important to “reparent” yourself as an adult so you can rewrite some of your unconscious beliefs around love and intimacy.
You are not your past. The past happened but the meaning you ascribe to and the action you take will determine what happens next. You are a creator, not a victim.
#attachmenttheory #relationships #avoidantattachment #anxiousattachment #secureattachment #intimacy
Why?
Because our first relationship in life was the one we had with our caregiver(s). If our needs were not met or were inconsistently met, we usually go on to develop and insecure attachment as an adult, even if our caregivers did the best job they could. This is why it is important to “reparent” yourself as an adult so you can rewrite some of your unconscious beliefs around love and intimacy.
You are not your past. The past happened but the meaning you ascribe to and the action you take will determine what happens next. You are a creator, not a victim.
#attachmenttheory #relationships #avoidantattachment #anxiousattachment #secureattachment #intimacy
body memorized the reactions we have to certain emotions and triggers.
When we are triggered by a person or situation, most of the time we are reacting to a past experience, not the current one. The body goes into autopilot. It does what it’s always done.
But with practice and conscious awareness we can CHOOSE new responses. We might not be able to change the initial feeling that comes up for us, but our power lies in how we respond.
Stop giving away your power and HARNESS IT instead.
#personaldevelopment #triggers #emotionalregulation #choice #personalpower
When we are triggered by a person or situation, most of the time we are reacting to a past experience, not the current one. The body goes into autopilot. It does what it’s always done.
But with practice and conscious awareness we can CHOOSE new responses. We might not be able to change the initial feeling that comes up for us, but our power lies in how we respond.
Stop giving away your power and HARNESS IT instead.
#personaldevelopment #triggers #emotionalregulation #choice #personalpower
Breakups are painful and when we’re in throes of one, it’s hard to think we’ll ever feel happy again.
But I’m here to remind you that if you’ve gone through a breakup before, think back to that time. You got through it. And you’re going to get through this one.
What people tend to forget is that someone doesn’t runaway with our love. They are not the keeper of our love. They were merely the canvas that we painted our love on. Not to mention, many times we are attached to the ROLE that someone played. They were part of our story, yes, but our story doesn’t die just because they’re no longer in it.
Continue to focus on your growth and your well-being and remember that your perspective will change with time.
#breakupadvice #relationships #heartbreak #personaldevelopment
But I’m here to remind you that if you’ve gone through a breakup before, think back to that time. You got through it. And you’re going to get through this one.
What people tend to forget is that someone doesn’t runaway with our love. They are not the keeper of our love. They were merely the canvas that we painted our love on. Not to mention, many times we are attached to the ROLE that someone played. They were part of our story, yes, but our story doesn’t die just because they’re no longer in it.
Continue to focus on your growth and your well-being and remember that your perspective will change with time.
#breakupadvice #relationships #heartbreak #personaldevelopment
If you want to find the love of your life you have to become the love of your life.
So many people over focus on the other person. Where to find them; what to look for; what that person should be like…yes those things are part of creating the connection but they are secondary.
Your primary goal is to remove the barriers in the way of romantic connection. Maybe what holds you back is an unhealed attachment. Maybe it’s an out of control ego. Maybe it’s a victim mindset. Maybe it’s low self esteem. Maybe it’s a lack of self-care and self-respect.
ANOTHER PERSON WON’T FIX YOUR PROBLEMS.
There is a saying: Pass it on or pass it back. When we don’t deal with something, we pass it on. We repeat it. When we “pass it back” it’s like a hot potato. We say hellll no, I don’t want this thing. And we figure out what we have to do to not hang on to it.
You don’t have to be a perfect person to meet someone and you don’t have to be fully healed. But what you do need to be is invested in your growth, your contribution and overcoming yourself.
Oh and one last thing, while looks are important, if you’re only focused on appearances or boasting your wealth (the outside) and not dealing with your emotions (the inside) then you will create superficial connections and relationships that will feel unfulfilling.
#relationships #personaldevelopment #becoming #selfimprovement
So many people over focus on the other person. Where to find them; what to look for; what that person should be like…yes those things are part of creating the connection but they are secondary.
Your primary goal is to remove the barriers in the way of romantic connection. Maybe what holds you back is an unhealed attachment. Maybe it’s an out of control ego. Maybe it’s a victim mindset. Maybe it’s low self esteem. Maybe it’s a lack of self-care and self-respect.
ANOTHER PERSON WON’T FIX YOUR PROBLEMS.
There is a saying: Pass it on or pass it back. When we don’t deal with something, we pass it on. We repeat it. When we “pass it back” it’s like a hot potato. We say hellll no, I don’t want this thing. And we figure out what we have to do to not hang on to it.
You don’t have to be a perfect person to meet someone and you don’t have to be fully healed. But what you do need to be is invested in your growth, your contribution and overcoming yourself.
Oh and one last thing, while looks are important, if you’re only focused on appearances or boasting your wealth (the outside) and not dealing with your emotions (the inside) then you will create superficial connections and relationships that will feel unfulfilling.
#relationships #personaldevelopment #becoming #selfimprovement
Two things can be true at the same time. You can be in love with someone but they can also be horrible for you. You can have one political affiliation but choose to vote the opposite. You can lose someone that is suffering but also feel relieved that they’re no longer in pain.
Instead of viewing everything as black and white - especially if you’re going through something difficult - embrace this grey area. In between extremes there is balance.
#mindset #conflictingemotions #personaldevelopment #greyzone
Instead of viewing everything as black and white - especially if you’re going through something difficult - embrace this grey area. In between extremes there is balance.
#mindset #conflictingemotions #personaldevelopment #greyzone
Poor communication is one of the main reasons why most couples don’t work out. Whether someone is saying something they don’t mean (which communicates the wrong message) or whether someone is NOT communicating their needs directly, this is the space where love gets lost.
Once words are spoken, they cannot be taken back. This is especially true with hurtful or untrue words, especially in the heat of the moment. On the other hand, when you don’t use your words because you fear rocking the boat or maybe you’re trying to control a person’s perception of you, then this is a missed opportunity to connect or to speak your truth respectfully.
Use your words intentionally. Even when you’re not communicating, you’re still communicating. Good communication is safety.
#communicationskills #relationships #intention #breakups #dating
Once words are spoken, they cannot be taken back. This is especially true with hurtful or untrue words, especially in the heat of the moment. On the other hand, when you don’t use your words because you fear rocking the boat or maybe you’re trying to control a person’s perception of you, then this is a missed opportunity to connect or to speak your truth respectfully.
Use your words intentionally. Even when you’re not communicating, you’re still communicating. Good communication is safety.
#communicationskills #relationships #intention #breakups #dating